Things I Never Thought I’d Say To My Cats

Sometimes I think we adopted 3 wild beasts instead of 3 cats. Other times they’re like sour patch kids. Sweet one moment then ornery like hell the next. I love my girls and they definitely bring joy, comfort, and entertainment to my life. So in honor of National Cat Day on October 29th, here’s a list of things I never thought I would say to my cats.

  • Don’t put your paw in the green bean juice
  • Get out of the dishwasher
  • Stop giving me stink eye
  • Who’s messing with the toilet lid?
  • Stop knocking the hand sanitizer off the table
Tilly giving me the stink eye
  • Don’t lick the dirty bath water
  • Don’t lay on top of the cookies
  • Stop thumping Daddy’s shoes
  • Don’t eat the vomit
  • The chair leg is not a toy
Poovey perched on the chair she just knocked over
  • Stop smacking your mother’s ass
  • Hashbrowns are not for kitties
  • Stop hissing at the neighbor’s cat while he’s taking a shit
  • Why are you rabbit kicking my foot?
  • Get out of the trash
My golden girl Savina
  • Are you in your hidey hole?
  • My insulin cap is not a toy
  • Stop head butting my medicine box off the table
  • Get your paw off my peaches
  • Are you jersey turnpiking? (Head down ass up in the air)
Savina loves to zoom!
  • Stop attacking me when I’m picking a wedgie
  • Why are you weighing yourself on the bathroom scale?
  • Get your nose out of the cinnamon sugar
  • Don’t smack Daddy’s dingle
  • Do you want toilet time?
Tilly loves to play in laundry baskets
Savina AKA Veenie Beanie
No room for me even in a king size bed
Poovey is a wild child!
Tilly getting her birthday sardine toy
Savina loves to hunt from her cube

8 thoughts on “Things I Never Thought I’d Say To My Cats

    1. Thank you! I know I am biased but I think my kitties are adorable too. 😁 I believe cats know how to be sweet at just the right time so we don’t hate them when the act crazy.


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